The psychological kind, not the S&M kind…(that’s another post)!

People won’t fully appreciate what they have if they are allowed to take it for granted.

 

 

If you feel you are in a situation where your man is getting too comfortable or taking you for granted, you may need to shake his confidence a little.

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In Part I, I talked about the importance of a “connection” with your partner as the basic ingredient for a great kiss. But how do you make a connection?

 

In order to do that the first thing you have to do is forget ‘technique’, relax, breathe and desire to experience this kiss, with this man this moment.

 

 

In this way, there is no ‘right’ way to kiss. Your desire to give and receive a great kiss is wanting to experience it WITH him not DO a technique TO him.

 

 

Our society in its quest for great sex focuses highly on technique and while some basic technical information is valuable, the over abundance of it kills intimacy in my opinion. The bottom line is each person comes with different preferences ‘technically speaking’ and you have to get to know your partner in order to find out what sparks him anyway. A mind focused “put A here while doing this to B” blocks your ability to focus on your partner and learn about his unique sexual identity.

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The hot and seductive movie “Bull Durham” has a great quote that comes from Crash Davis (played by Kevin Costner) who says…

 

 

“Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman’s back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch…. and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.”

 

 

I couldn’t agree more!

 

Seriously, of all the sexual things two people can do, kissing tops out as the most sensual, intimate, vulnerable, erotic and telling.

 

 

Our kissing style gives our partner messages about us, our mood, out intention, and our sexual identity…..

Since most communication is non-verbal have you ever received or given any of these kinds of kisses?

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From the French, literally translated “I know not what”.

It’s an intangible quality that makes something attractive or alluring.

 

Seduction is all about je ne sais quoi.
It’s about confidence, intelligence, wit and beauty.

 

Being clever and crafty, sexual and haunting.
The way a woman carries herself with a glow of inner peace and tranquility.

 

Je ne sais quoi

 

I was out to dinner the other night at a local 4 star restaurant.

The décor was beautiful the staff gave exceptional personal attention, the food exquisite.
It wasn’t very crowded so I noticed a couple who walked in and was seated near my table.

 

He was an older gentleman, very well dressed and on his arm was a lovely younger woman also very nicely dressed.

By her appearance alone, she looked quite elegant.
But as I watched them periodically throughout the evening, she became less attractive by the minute.

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What’s absolutely necessary in becoming a seductive person is weeding out any negative attitudes you carry that are roadblocks to possessing, harnessing and exuding your sexual energy. Seductive sexual energy is free flowing. It’s electric and magnetic and you are the conduit.
If the conduit is blocked, the energy’s not flowing and neither is the seduction.

 

Do you carry anger, fear or resentment toward the opposite sex? Do you blame men for past hurts that YOU won’t let go of? Are you controlling, needy, and insecure or untrusting?

 

All of these qualities are cancerous to the inner peace and balance required for seduction. No matter how well you imagine that you are hiding them, you’ll give off negative vibes that men will sense causing them to loose interest in you.

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Humans have many basic needs: food, water, shelter. Touching and being touched may be just as important.

 

Here are some facts about touch:

 

• There are 50 touch receptors every square centimeter of skin.
• We have 5 million sensory cells.
• Bodies release the pleasure and stress reducing hormone oxytocin when touched.
• Studies have shown that in the absence of touch people of all ages can become sick, depressed and immune compromised.
• Infants deprived of touch can wither and even die.

 

Touching and being touched is an important part of relationships, increasing intimacy, warmth, feelings of connectedness and pleasure. It’s a way to convey understanding and compassion between friends, or love and passion between lovers.

 

Seductive people use the power of touch to communicate more than mere words ever could. Not all touches have to lead to sex. Here are some sensual touches to remember when your relationship is not yet sexual:

 

• Find excuses to touch him. Straighten his tie or gently pick something off of his clothes, then before you remove your hand, lay it open palm on his chest for a few moments.
• Hook you arm around his and put your head on his shoulder.
• Hold hands.
• Rub the back of his neck and play with his hair as he’s driving.
• Give him a good strong hug. Men often feel that women don’t touch them firmly enough; make sure he feels it.
• Don’t let your hands go idle when you kiss. Run them up his arms to his shoulders. Use your fingers on his neck and hair.
• Cuddle up against him while watching a movie.

 

When you are in a sexual relationship:

 

• Continue to do all of the above.
• Give him a body massage.
• Have sex….a lot!

Seductresses, you might want to consider choosing to wear a “little red dress” instead of a black one for your next date.

A recent study suggests that wearing red can unconsciously make a man more attracted to you.

 

Studies show that when men were presented with photos of women under a variety of color presentations, the women who were wearing red or surrounded by a red background were significantly more sexually attractive to them. The men were also more likely to treat them to a better or more expensive outing.

Other interesting findings:

 

• The color red only incresed men’s perception of the women’s sexual attractiveness. It did not change how they rated the woman’s likability, intelligence or kindness.
• The color red only affects men, when women rated other women, perceptions of attractiveness did not change.

 

The studies support what our society has already known; the color red has long been associated with love, romance and passion but they also suggest that men’s response to red has bilologcal roots.

“Research has shown that nonhuman male primates are particularly attracted to females displaying red. Female baboons and chimpanzees, for example, redden conspicuously when nearing ovulation, sending a clear sexual signal designed to attract males.”

Check out the article.

 

For myself, I have seemed to receive more compliments when wearing red. I have always believed it is because red compliments my coloring, I am a fair skinned brunette. But now I wonder?…..

Seductresses? Have you noticed receiving more attention while wearing red?

 

How long should you wait before having sex? As long as possible and there are many reasons why.

 

If you already have a time frame for sex set in your mind: married first, engaged, or at the least in an exclusive relationship, I applaud you for thinking it through and honoring your values. But what if you don’t have boundaries set regarding sex.

 

Then what? Trouble…because that is when one of the following may happen.

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Today, let’s talk about the sense of Hearing.

 

Sound can be very powerful: waves crashing on the shore, leaves crunching under your feet, children laughing, a slot machine that just hit the jackpot. Some sounds relax us, some annoy us, and some seduce us like a compliment from our lover or his whisper or moan.

 

You have the power to impact your husband or even your first date by making sure he’s affected positively by what he hears…

 

Here are some basic dos and don’ts to keep in mind.

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If you want to effect a lasting impression on your man, bring all of his senses to life.  

 

Today, let’s talk about sight.

 

It’s been proven that when the senses are engaged in an experience, the memory of the experience is stronger. Weather you are newly dating, in a long term relationship or married, paying attention to the sensual aspects of your environment will affect your relationship in a positive way.

 

Let’s explore…

 

Men are awed by women who naturally and easily express their God given sensuality. They are drawn in and mysteriously spell cast by our femininity. Do you make an effort to bring your best self forward in appearance and attitude or have you become complacent from your routine? Here are some ideas to consider with regards to the sense of “sight”.

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