I like to define class as an equal mix of Manners and Etiquette.

 

Manners- Being considerate and respectful of others.

 

Etiquette- Set rules or guidelines for behavior in specific situations. (Use of dinner utensils, gift giving, social decorum)

 

Here are some basic tips for both!

Three Guidelines for Great Manners

Treat Everyone With Respect- Don’t save your manners for those you are trying to impress or for those you are grooming to help you in the future.

 

 

Use Tact- It’s always wise to be honest but don’t use honesty as an excuse to say something hurtful.

 

 

Be Considerate- Be on time, show people you value and appreciate them, say “please” and “thank you”, be considerate of other’s comfort.

                                                                                                 

 

Basic Table Etiquette

 

Place your napkin on your lap as soon as you sit down.

 

If you’re at a formal dinner, wait until your host does so first.

 

Don’t begin eating until everyone else has been served.

Exceptions: Picnics or buffets or if your host insists that you begin.

 

Chew with your mouth closed and no talking with your mouth open.

(This should go without saying but I see this all the time from adults!)

 

No double dipping- After food has touched your mouth, never reinsert it into shared sauce or dip.

 

Cut one piece of food at a time, you are not 5 years old.

 

Salt & Pepper- Always pass both salt and pepper together, even when only one is asked for.

 

Elbows off the table when food is on your plate.

You may place elbows on the table between courses, before dinner is served or after the plates have been cleared away.

 

Place your napkin on your chair when you excuse yourself from the table.

Place it on the table when you are finished with your meal.

 

Taste your food before you add salt or pepper.

 

Don’t blow on your food.

 

Sit up straight.

 

Cutting your food- Hold your fork in your left hand, tines pointed down with the handle in the palm of your hand and your index finger extended and resting along the neck.

Switch your fork back to your right hand to eat.

 

Once you use your knife, it shouldn’t rest on the table. Place it on the edge of your plate at 10 and 2 o’clock.

 

Don’t bring a whole dinner roll or slice of bread up to your mouth.

Tear off smaller bite size pieces with your fingers one at a time, butter it and repeat the process.

 

Spoon soup away from you then bring it to your mouth.

Take soup from the side of the spoon, do not insert the whole spoon into your mouth.

 

Lay both your fork and knife across the center of your plate to signal you are finished.

6 Comments »

1. 

   Comment by Mary D — February 20, 2009 @ 12:40 pm

   Thank you for putting Manners first. Many people who like to think they are classy, forget the manners part. That is the most important part to me. A guy who is rude to the waiter? Never dating him again. I don’t know how the idea that money, designer clothes, yachts & rare wines equal class caught on, but that isn’t class.~Mary

2. 

   Comment by The Seductress — February 20, 2009 @ 1:41 pm

   You are right Mary, without Manners, all the money and things in the world can’t make you classy!
   That old saying, “class is how you treat people who can do nothing for you” holds a lot of truth….

   The Seductress

3. 

   Comment by George — February 21, 2009 @ 10:46 am

   Oh Bravo for you dear Seductress! Manners and Etiquette go a long way. As one tends to get lazy. I also agree with Mary…I do think you should treat everyone with respect and manners, not treating waitstaff properly really is annoying and classless. I think that there should be a proper manners and etiquette class in the classrooms, as a lot of parents don’t have what it takes to teach their children.

4. 

   Comment by hunter — February 24, 2009 @ 2:15 am

   Thank you, I appreciate the manners/etiquette guidelines.

5. 

   Comment by The Seductress — March 20, 2009 @ 11:23 am

   Hi Hunter, you are welcome!

6. 

   Comment by -NN- — July 31, 2009 @ 11:33 am

   “Cutting your food- Hold your fork in your left hand, tines pointed down with the handle in the palm of your hand and your index finger extended and resting along the neck.

   Switch your fork back to your right hand to eat.”

   It seems like etiquette changes according to culture - and you forgot that. One could consider your advice bad manners since when you use knife and fork - fork is _always_ in the right hand.

   But I am European - I think being nitpicker, and the thought that everybody should act like you to have good manners, just means you are unattractive person who has issues with self-esteem, as you seem to have a need to feel superior about something.
   I find laid-backness much more attractive, that is a way to get along with everybody - also outside one’s own comfort zone.

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